So many people get involved in a relationship that isn’t good for them because they are afraid of being alone. To get out of this mind thought, eat alone. Find a place you like. If flowers are your thing…eat next to them. If fine china makes you feel worthy eat with fine china. You are enough, unless you don’t believe it’s so. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAYVp3XgjWo
I remember back in the late 90′s when I was a single man dating more than one woman at a time. My reasoning for dating more than one woman at a time was “There isn’t one woman who can meet my needs so why not choose them depending on what I need?” I would date one woman for my emotional needs, then another for sexual needs, and another for eye candy who I would bring around my friends to show them “Look who I’m with!” I wasn’t sleeping with all three women but I was selfish because if they were having an “off day” or I didn’t feel like being bothered then you wouldn’t hear from me and I would be with another woman hanging out.
Then one day I dated a girl I really cared about. We dated (just me and her, no one else was involved) for two years and then the relationship fell apart. She dated someone else and I still wanted to be with her. I waited hoping she would come back although me and her spent weekends together while her boyfriend was still in college. I asked her to end her relationship with her new boyfriend so we could be back together and she said something to me that changed the way I thought about myself. She said to me “If me and him don’t work out l’ll come back to you.” Although it was a slow process breaking away from her, I did it because I didn’t want to be second place. That relationship was a mess….
Merriam-Webster define Dating as: the series of social engagements shared by a couple looking to get married
Since Merriam-Webster define dating as the series of social engagements shared by a couple looking to get married, then if our end goal isn’t marriage, we are simply using people to fulfill our personal needs. Are you ok with someone telling you “I’m seeing other people also, but we can still date.” Call me selfish but if I’m interested in you and we are dating, I’m assuming you feel the same about me. Ever wonder why the person you’re dating now still have hurt from an ex boyfriend or girlfriend? Because they were used in the so-called dating scene where it’s ok to use people for your emotional needs (and sometimes sexual) until that “feeling” is no longer there and then on to the next one…
Comparison: When you date more than one person, over the course of time someone is bound to be heartbroken. They have invested time in you and eventually feelings come into play. If you spend time with someone there has to be some type of connection or else you wouldn’t invest the time. No one spends time with the coworker they dislike, because there’s no type of connection. If you spent six months dating two different people at the same time, one day you will have to make a decision because emotionally it’s draining you. Someone will “lose” in choosing the prize they desired because of the time invested and hope for a future together. Once you train your mind to think it’s ok to date more than one person at a time, if your desired destination is marriage, tread lightly!
In marriage you will find out your spouse can’t be your everything, only Jesus can fill that void. That’s why you’re dating more than one person at a time because of your various needs and the instability of people will let you down every time. Why not trust God and give your undivided attention to one person you believe is that special one for you? Dating more than one person at a time is saying to God, if this one don’t work I have a plan B. Let’s stop having relationship options and walk by faith. If we keep up this cycle of new age dating there will be many more hurt people. What are your thoughts? Let me hear you!